Dealin' With Myself

Still without a job. Still on a career crisis , although in a bit of a different position than I was a month ago. I have started to take Dutch lessons and making an effort to avoid panic . I managed to get some distance from the overwhelmingness of the whole situation, some distance from my thoughts and things seem to start to clarify a tiny little bit. I must hold on to that little bit and feed it. So I decided to put up all the possibilities of work that could come to my mind. On one side there's all the undifferentiated work I can do without speaking Dutch, on the other, the things that I am quite good at and want to do more, some of these things are also possible to do in English. The question now is: where to start? I think it will be to try to get something to pay the bills, even if that means to wash dishes in English, while I feed the right hand side columns.

When you arrive in a country and you don't speak the language, you start discovering a few things about yourself and your own practice. I entered a career crisis ... Because of this crisis, two things happened: 1 - I got panic. So I went for just anything I could. I know now that a better use of my time would have been to have intensive language lessons when I arrived, almost instead of looking for a job... 2 - I asked for help. I asked around for contacts of a coach who could help me pull myself back together. Yesterday and today I was working as a cleaner. I was told I didn't need to speak English so I took it. A bit of a tough job. I might write more about it later, but today I want to share an advice I received: "here in Holland, when you work in places like this, look around and do what the others do - if they are slow, be slow; if the are running around like Foon Foon Foon, do it also". I had already been told to slow down and take it easy a couple of t